How To Address Blogging Jealousy

5
  March 31, 2018 blogging tips 🕑 5 minutes read

Hiking to the top of the world near the bottom of the world in Opotiki, New Zealand. Don’t you just want to push me off of the cliff? I just wanted to roll around in that light green grass.

 

Every country has its beauty.

 

Then there’s New Zealand.

 

I could shoot New Zealand from a goddamn sewer and it’d look stunning.

 

I’m spending 3 months in the most jaw-dropping country on earth. The absurd-ly pristine, clean, pollution free nature of NZ combined with the Avatar from Pandora range of dramatic, varying landscapes make this land the most mesmerizing spot on planet earth.

 

But a little over a year ago I liquid shat next to cow paddies in Myanmar. At 1 AM. After retching on an 11 hour bus ride for hours on end. 3rd world, devilish digestive demons wreaked havoc on my innards.

 

I made it to the hotel, eventually. My toilet looked like a Jackson Pollack painting.

 

I have lived in Fiji, Bali, Costa Rica and Thailand for months at a time. Jaw-dropping scenery. Enlightened experiences. Thrilling.

 

Some bloggers wish to physically reach through cyber space to ring my scrawny (well, not really) neck, perhaps wishing to cyber slap me silly out of jealousy or envy.

 

But if you knew I wanted to kill myself a decade ago and even had these thoughts earlier in my blogging journey, your envy would dissolve into compassion.

 

The Whole Story

 

Yesterday I received an Amazon Associates payment. Notification via email. I give not 2 craps as to the amount because I spend .0000001% of my attention focusing on the means of exchange known as money, because I spend 99.9999999% serving others and living my dreams and circling the globe.

 

Jealousy may seize you if not a stinking cent has flowed through your blog. Here goes this asshole earning scrilla by Hobbiton, bragging with his pictures from paradise, laughing in his ironic T-shirts, smiling like the Cheshire Cat.

 

But you probably would not have been jealous of me when I fell $70,000 into debt, went bankrupt and possessed 4 pennies in my wallet. Or when I lived off 25 cent bags of peanuts for weeks at a time, dropping 30 pounds, prepping myself for Gollum tryouts……My…..Prrrreciousssss…..

 

Blogging Jealousy

 

If you are jealous of me, my blog or my lifestyle, the best way to cure yourself of this success-blocking, ego-induced, miserable malady is to realize that I dove into the fears-sour that you’re refusing to dive into, and that’s why I’m living my love-sweet life. Or, my dream life.

 

Folks say to me, “Ryan, I’d love to feel that detached about money, but I just cannot feel that way.”

 

Well fuck; lose all of your money *LITERALLY* and you’ll release the fear of losing money LOL! I’ve done it. Works like a charm.

 

In all seriousness; no need to experience my nightmares to development detachment, and to live your dreams. But to address blogging jealous issues you want to embrace this concept: the person you are jealous of did the freeing but highly uncomfortable things you feel terrified to do to purge fears and to live dreams.

 

Why Blogging Jealousy Is Literally Insane

 

Blogging jealousy is insane because it dismisses….the rest of the story.

 

My family listened to Paul Harvey on radio every night during dinner. Told ya I was old as hell. Noted when I do not shoe polish my hair.

 

He discussed a star’s life before they were stars, sharing tidbits few people knew about.

 

The short, 1-3 minute long interlude was titled “The Rest of the Story.”

 

Blogging jealousy is insane because it dismisses those moments of deep pain, fear, terror and horror, that successful bloggers experience and purge, to become happy and prospering and to live their dreams.

 

Jealousy dismisses the rest of the story. 

 

Granted; these were moments of diving into fear. Not millenia. But feeling jealous of a blogger living their dreams goads you to explore deep blogging and life fears to dive into, to feel, to embrace, to cry through, to scream through, to release, so you can progress from a happier, healthier, more peaceful, more ready and willing to study blogging, learn blogging, to practice blogging and to create and connect generously, so you lay the foundation for a successful blog that helps you live your dreams.

 

Being jealous of a blogger living their dreams is like choosing to slap on a set of handcuffs, being offered handcuff-unlocking-keys from the blogger, and telling them, “No, thank you. I am miserable but feel much more comfortable wearing these cuffs.”

 

What are the keys?

 

Diving into your blogging and life fears.

 

Do that habitually and the yoke of blogging jealousy dissolves into love, appreciation and harmony.

 

Something neat happens too; you learn from bloggers who you were formerly jealous of and step toward your dream life one moment at a time.

 

Practical Tips

 

  • feel the fears *you need to dive into* that fuel your blogging jealousy, however mild, or however unpleasant; this is like pulling a band-aid off of a wound quickly
  • treat yourself with love and compassion as you feel these fears
  • accept the truth that happy bloggers are living their dreams because they dove into deep fears and explored intense experiences that you are wading into now, to free yourself of the poison of jealousy
  • embrace the truth that all jealousy is a projection that has nothing to do with happy-crappy blogger and everything to do with you, and how you choose to perceive the world
  • choose to be the authentic, genuine you through your blog and life; you will never be jealous of anybody again

 

10 years ago I kinda lived in squalor, consuming a boxcar hobo diet and doing a cameo as the Romanian-German-Irish Ratso Rizzo. Even though I was far from living my dreams, pre circling the globe as a pro blogger, I faced a few deep fears, decided to be me, and largely ceased being jealous of top bloggers.

 

Even if you’re not living your dreams now, if you choose to dive into deep fears, you’ll feel comfortable in your own skin, jealousy vanishes and you’ll admire those odd, happy birds, living in New Zealand for 3 months, who are also happy in their own skin.

 

What tips can you add guys?

  1. Agness says:
    at 12:33 am

    Thanks a lot for sharing, Ryan. Cez just returned to Bangkok after visiting Myanmar and I’m in Laos. That’s actually a great article. We aren’t very jealous bloggers but we get your point. BTW, how was Fiji and Costa Rica? I want to go there very soon. 🙂

    • Ryan Biddulph says:
      at 8:46 pm

      Cool guys. I’m happy you’re seeing SE Asia. Fiji and CR were fabulous; both pretty, and green, pristine and really friendly locals.

  2. Israel Olatunji says:
    at 4:33 am

    Thanks for the awesome post, Ryan! I equally accepted the fact that being the genuine and authentic you will remove all the jealousy elements and strengthen one’s desire to actualize the set money goals.

    From my own blogging experience, I discovered that people don’t really understand what it actually entails to become a successful and rocking blogger.

    Jealousy develops in a blogger when he sees other bloggers rock their blogs with commitment and persistence. The jealous among bloggers are people who are not ready to give blogging what it entails.

    Thanks for the blogging tips, Ryan!
    Israel Olatunji

    • Ryan Biddulph says:
      at 8:36 pm

      The persistence thingee burns many bloggers Israel. But opening up and humbling yourself turns envy into appreciation, a shift where sweetness grows. Thanks brother!

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