I saw his ding dong in Jimbaran.
An aged Balinese man lay spread eagle on the beaches of Jimbaran Bay, Bali.
He was going au natural.
I was going “Oh no.”
Imagine Sports Illustrated swimsuit pose meets senior Indonesian, a mix of sultry sex appeal and jarring geritol assaulting my senses.
This wasn’t my only experience with nudity in Bali.
- nubile nudes bathing in the rice field streams around Ubud
- babes, boobs and bensin at a gas station in Jimbaran
- flapjacks in a Balinese compound (don’t ask; or, just connect a cherished Western breakfast with aging women’s anatomy)
Hey….I want to bring stories back to blogging.
So I share what I can to entertain, educate, inspire and yeah, to make you LOL because learning through the art of telling stories is more enjoyable than through any other medium.
Follow these 10 tips to improve your story telling skills.
1: Have Fun
Feeling tension = no story telling.
Feeling some tension = lame story telling.
Having a barrel of monkey’s worth of fun = colorful story telling.
Once the tension leaves, stories flow.
This is why drunks often tell wonderful, vivid, intriguing stories. Da suds dissolve da tension. Or, getting blitzed dissolves your worries and anxieties – artificially (I am not encouraging you to go all Hemingway on me) – and those stories flow and flow and flow, as does the vino, vino, vino.
Blog for fun. Predominantly.
Craft masterful stories.
2: Read Colorful Authors
Just wrapped up my daily “A Song of Ice and Fire” reading.
George R.R. Martin is a brilliant story teller. Guy inspires me to tell entertaining stories. Through osmosis.
Read enthralling authors. Feed off of their genius.
3: Paint a Picture Not a Post
I envision myself painting a picture before sitting down to my WordPress backoffice, not writing a blog post.
Intent makes all the difference.
Colorful tale weavers see their WordPress backoffice as a palette, not a post dumping space.
Reframe your blogging intent to tell more enchanting stories.
4: Add Deets, Sweets
Add details to your stories.
Adding da deets makes your stories a little more sweet.
Jerry Jaws slavered at the mouf, sinking his ragged chompers into my taut, swollen triceps, doing his best impersonation of a monster from a 70’s B movie.
I stared down in both shock and horror as his Nepali incisors tried to worry away at my skin.
The saliva/skin union set off an alarm whose impulse sped to my Monkey Mind.
On heeding this red flag I jerked away from Jerry Jaws in violent fashion.
He wanted 20 rupee for a buttered roll.
He got Biddulph biceps.
At least for a split second.
Just another blase day in Kathmandu.
I coulda “had a run in with a guy in Nepal”.
Or an intensely vivid encounter with a ragged toothed wild man in Kathmandu.
What makes for the better story?
You know damn well.
5: Write 1,000 Words Daily (or More)
Become a better story weaver.
Writing helps you gain clarity. Helps you find your writing voice. Helps you tell stories with confidence.
Open a Word document.
Trash the document after you’re done.
Develop your skills.
Craft enchanting tales sung by minions the world round.
Whether you’re making mistakes with guest posting, posting to your blog or with any writing-related venture this simple step – writing daily – will dissolve your probs into delicious opportunities for growth.
Flex your mental muscles.
Imagine your stories before you tell ’em.
Example: by visualizing an encounter at a shake stand at Nai Harn Beach in Phuket, Thailand, I could write this…..
He barreled through like a verbal bull in a China shop, doing his best Ivan Drago impersonation.
One of the 46 million Russians who vacation on the island of Phuket, the Moscow of the Andaman, bluntly ordered of the Thai beach hawker:
“Banana shake. How much?”
Response from Thai guy: “45 Baht.”
Russian: “Too much.”
Thai guy smiles.
Russian bluntly blurts out: “30 Baht good.”
Thai guy smiles like the Cheshire Cat.
Russian guy stares like Putin.
Thai guy smiles again.
Awkward tension, not unlike when we took our Catholic school trip as 8th graders and passed a seedy district in NYC while Sister Anita the Carmelite nun – our teacher – slowly observed her jaw drop when eyeing an adult theater billboard trumpeting the new movie, “The Eager Beaver Gets the Worm”.
Eventually, after glaciers shifted miles, the Russian blinked, forked over his precious Baht, and the transaction occurred.
I could not have told that story unless I saw the experience clearly in mind.
7: Fall in Deeper Love with Writing
Shhh….don’t tell wifey.
I’m in an affair. A love affair. With writing.
Why else would I be writing this post at 12:11 AM on Christmas Eve Morning?
Most folks are wrapping presents. Some folks just started shopping (Seriously, Papa Biddulph often dove full bore into Christmas shopping 5 to 12 hours pre-Christmas morning).
I’m writing this post – and weaving in stories – because I love writing. I really, really, really love writing and really, really, really love storytelling.
Think less about blogging and more about weaving colorful, entertaining, humorous stories so your readers can join in the fun.
Sitting to observe your thoughts and feelings dissolves writer’s block.
Dissolving writer’s block opens you up to creative ideas.
Opening up to creative ideas helps you become a better storyteller.
Meditate daily. Start at 5 minutes.
9: Whip Yourself with a Wet Noodle Thrice Daily
Slimy carbohydrates motivate like few sources.
10: Watch Netflix
I’m listening to “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” in the background.
One of my fave Netflix shows. One of many, really.
Watching Netflix gives you plenty of story telling material. A slew of pop culture references. A steady appeal to your imagination.
Drop the 10 bucks a month. Well worth it.
How are you becoming a better storyteller?
What tips can you add?
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